Sunday is Mother’s Day! If you have forgotten, yes, you should be racked with guilt. Not to panic though, there’s still some time. Mother’s Day is the perfect opportunity for all to pay homage to the valuable—yet too often underappreciated— women in our lives.

The problem is- I never know what to get my mom. Even Google can’t provide me with the right answers. Searching “Mother’s Day gifts” only results in the bombardment of ads for flowers, perfume, jewelry and spa visits—none of which my mom really cares for. And while a ordering a bouquet of flowers is nice, it’s not very personal and it’s more or less an effortless act. A Mother’ Day gift should be thoughtful, and thus should require a good amount of thought on the gift givers’ part. Go beyond the generic gifts. Take back Mother’s Day from Hallmark and 1-800-FLOWERS, and make it your own. Celebrate Mother’s Day like you mean it.

Having said that, I have little advice to offer. All moms are unique, and all relationships with moms are unique. No one gift can fit all mothers. Cheesy as it sounds, the best gift ideas can only come to you after reflection and introspection upon your relationship with your mom, and upon who your mom really is as a person. So much of mothers’ needs, desires, dimensions get overshadowed by their identity as a caregiver. Use this Mother’s Day to think about and discover who this woman really is. Do you know what she was like before you came into her life? Do you know how she felt when she was pregnant with you?

There is one thing—one Mother’s Day trick—that can never fail: a good ole homemade card. No excuses. You can never be too old or inartistic to make a card. Break out those dusty crayons and markers; and write her a personalized message that goes beyond “Happy Mother’s Day! Love, [Your Name Here]”. This Sunday you have the opportunity to tell your mom how much you love and appreciate her without the fear of being inappropriately sentimental. So, use it, and good luck!

For those who really want to impress the Moms…

If you want to go above and beyond this Mother’s Day, raise your awareness about the social and political issues facing mothers today. The truth is moms are systematically devalued. Even though mothers are the major wealth producers in our economy, their contributions are considered immaterial. “Most people, like infants in a crib, take female caregiving utterly for granted,” writes economist Ann Crittenden.

Did you know?

• Only four countries in the world—Lesotho, Swaziland, Papua New Guinea and the United States fail to provide paid maternity leave to all workers.
• Mothers in the United States are only half as likely as non-mothers to be hired for the same job and the average college graduate who becomes a mother will sacrifice a million dollars over her lifetime.
• Businesses that create flexible work environments find that productivity goes up, they attract more talent, turnover is reduce and their bottom line is improved.

(Statistics from The Motherhood Manifesto)

To learn more about the plight of mothers, refer to the following sources:

• [book] The Motherhood Manifesto: What America’s Moms want, and What to do About It by Joan Blades and Kristin Rowe Finbeiner
• [book] The Price of Motherhood: Why the Most Important Job in the World is Still the Least Valued by Ann Crittenden
• [web] Moms Rising aims build a more family friendly America. They work for cultural and legislative change. They are in favor of maternity and paternity leave, fair wages, healthcare for all children, and flexible work hours among other things.

Are you a parent and a student at the University? To learn more about the services and support available to you, go here.